Winter

my breath makes clouds
in the freezing bedroom
warm blankets

Area 17 said...: What an enjoyable haiku!

my breath makes clouds
in the freezing bedroom
warm blankets

I think you should bring up those lovely warm blankets to the first line. ;-)

warm blankets
my breath makes clouds
in the bedroom

I don't think you need 'freezing' as hopefully everyone should realise it's cold if your breath is making clouds.

Sounds like you are making clouds above a warm blanket land, neat! ;-)

Alan; December 10, 2009

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